Laugh it up

Sep 15th, 2007 | By | Category: Laugh it up

A man asks the doctor, " After I become better, will I be able to play the guitar"
"Sure, Why not?" says the doctor.
"That's great! I could never play one before."


John, the miser, was on his death bed.
"Is my wife here?"he asked.
"Yes, I'm here, right next to you," she answered.
"And the kids?"
"We are here, father," one of the kids said.
"Is the rest of the family here too?"
"Around your bed," his wife assured him.
At that john sits up  and yells, " Then why is the kitchen light on?"


 One day  Jack knocked on his neighbour's door. His neighbour, who was an old lady, asked what the matter was. The man replied "I am very sorry, but I just ran over your cat, and it died," the man continued, "but I would like to replace it." The old lady thought for a moment and said, "Ok! But I hope you are as good at catching mice as she was!!!"


When the waiter in a Mumbai city restaurant brought him the special soup of the day, the American was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?" "Why, it's bean soup," the waiter replied.

"I don't care what it has been," he shot back, "What is it now?" 


A young man reports for his first day of work at a Multi-national Company. The manager greets him with a warm handshake and a smile, gives him a broom and says, "Your first job will be to sweep out the floor." "But I'm an IIM graduate," the young man replies more than just a little indignant.

"Oh, I'm sorry… I didn't know that," says the manager. "Here, give me the broom – I'll show you how." 


The math teacher saw that little Banta wasn't paying attention in class. She asked him to come to the front of the class and asked, "Banta! what are 1, 3, 5 and 7?" Little Banta didn't hesitate and quickly answered , "MTV, POGO, HBO and the Cartoon Network!" 


Heard an interesting joke, or have a funny story to share! Send them to editor@themag.in

 



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Laugh it up

Sep 1st, 2007 | By | Category: Laugh it up

One day, a woman named Jennifer had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience. She saw God and asked, "Is this it?"

God said, "No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live."

Upon her recovery, she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants, a face lift, liposuction and breast augmentation. She even had someone dye her hair. She thought since she had another 30 to 40 years to live, she might as well make the most of it.

Later, as she walked out of the hospital lobby, she was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital. She arrived in front of God and said, "I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years?"

God replied, "Jennifer!!!! I didn't recognize you!"

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