Love YourselfDec 13th, 2008 | By Rohit Sharma | Category: Articles, Still Fresh
No one is courageous enough to be alone; you need some one. Why do you need some one? You are afraid of your own loneliness. You become bored with yourself. And really when you are lonely nothing seems meaningful. With some one you are occupied, and you create artificial meanings around you.
You cannot live for yourself, so you start to live for some one else. And the same is the case with that some one else too – he or she can’t live alone, so he or she is in search to find some one. Two persons who are afraid of their own loneliness come together and they start a play – a play of friendship and love. But deep down they are searching for attachment, commitment and bondage.
You can’t directly ask some one for slavery; it is too humiliating. And directly you cannot say to some one, “Become my slave,” he will revolt! Nor can you say, “I can’t live without you.” But the meaning is there; it is the same. And when this – the real desire – is fulfilled, love disappears. Then you feel bondage, slavery, and then you start struggling to become free.
It is one of the paradoxes of the mind: whatsoever you get you will be bored with, and what so ever you do not get you will long for, some slavery, some bondage. When you are in bondage you’ll long for freedom – and free people try again to be slaves. The mind goes on like a pendulum, moving from one extreme to another.
Love doesn’t become an attachment, rather it was a need; love was just the attraction. You were in search of a need named attachment; love was just an attraction to catch the need.
When the fish is caught, the bait is thrown.
Remember this, and whenever you are doing something, go deep within yourself to find about the basic cause. The moment you feel you are no longer dependent on anyone, a deep silence settles inside and self reliance comes. It does not mean that you start staying alone or stop loving. On the contrary, for the first time you will know a new quality, a new dimension of love – a love that is no longer biological, a love that is closer to friendliness than any relationship of the world.